Running away

Quite often since we began this journey of ours, we have received the same question: What are you running away from? Just like a journey around the world, and a detachment from what you might think is "normal" is something that must be "wrong". We have sometimes met this perception that exists out there that people who are not interested in locking themselves up with a conventional job or who're not interested in settling down in one specific place, must be "running away from something bad". And every-time I receive the question I laugh and I wonder: Where the fuck do you want me to begin?

If you have read this blog before, you should have also understood what we actually are running away from, it is partly explained here, here and here. But if you have a second to spare I can try to refresh your memory, but listen closely as a few of you seem to have missed the point in what earlier has been said.

We run away from conformity, from routines of an everyday life that doesn't suit us and times and appointments that we have no interest in living by at the moment, we run away from cold air, snow and miserable weather. We also are not very fond of the psychological climate that sometimes occurs in both big cities and small villages where people tend to become jealous, bitter and fake when they are not fully content with their own lives. We want to escape mundanity and stagnation. We also wish to eliminate the closeness to people who are everywhere around us, the ones who are insecure and who take their bitterness out on others. We want to get released from the stress and pressure that sometimes is a part of the normal everyday world. In the normal world, the society and the people like to box each other in to categories, and as long as you know who you are, this shouldn't be too much of a problem, but here on the seas you almost don't have to face that conflict at all. We do not wish to stay in one place for the moment as the world is huge and offers so many possibilities. We want to see it all, experience it all, smell thousands of flowers and taste a vast amount of fruits before we know where we wish to settle.

Both of us have gone through quite a few relationships in the past, long and short, good and not so good ones, not so serious and the very serious ones, but this is the first one where we both feel that we finally have found completely right. This journey is a fantastic way for us to get even closer to each other, to get to know every part of each other without too much of outside distractions which hopefully will help us prepare for the day when we wish to begin expanding this little family of ours.

We have always been explorers, vagabonds, travelers, free-spirited gypsies in heart and we are immensely interested in different cultures, in inspiring people, in the simple but beautiful things, the real, naked world and its natural wonders - and in order to stimulate those interests, we must "run away" as you call it, to be able to experience for real. For us it has never been enough with only "visiting" places for a week or two, we've always wanted to become a part of the cities, towns and countries we stayed in as we know that this will help opening up our eyes to the magics of the world, even more. We have embarked on this journey to get a chance to breath, to be able to feel something new. We do this to get a chance to feel free, you know, we want to study what type of feelings and thoughts one can experience, create and embrace when not following the rules and codes of a mundane traditional way of living. Do you know how much there is to feel, understand, experience and see when you are no longer part of the normality, but instead free on your own? There are many people in the "normal world" who can inspire you to make business in the best ways possible and who can teach you a thing or two about ... things. But there are not many people out there in the locked up world that has something new and inspiring to say about true things. Because it sometimes seems like everyone are copies of each other. And as soon as one inspiring person arrives, people tend to imitate that very one and suddenly you don't know who is who, as they all blend into the same soggy mixture where everyone desperately tries to be the one.

Me and Alex are dreamers, doers and even creators and we love life too much to lock ourselves up when we know that there is a possibility to sail the oceans of the world. We have no will to live by someone's else law or order for the moment as we know that there are other ways to go in this life and we know that there still exists the possibility to feel much more free than what you do in your "normal" world. Therefore we have taken the chance and the possibility to release ourselves for a while. We have given ourselves the opportunity in getting out of the normality and into the wild. Into a world where only we (and the weather) decides what we will do, where we will go, what time we should wake up in the mornings. For the moment we are not interested in anything else than making ourselves, our families and closest friends happy and content human beings and the rest of the rules, worries and questions a normal world might offer we do not pay too much attention to.

I know that some of you might think that this all sounds selfish, but this is our truth. We do what we want, we go wherever we wish, we go to sleep and wake up whenever we feel like, we have the whole wide world as our playground, we have not much to complain about as we don't put ourselves in trouble and pain and we are making sure that we can fulfill all of our dreams, the small ones and the big ones, one after another, day after day.

Why? Because we can.

Delivery

Just got a package from Brazil.... what can it be?

Will show you soon, I'm sure you will like it.

It is very interesting to read your thoughts by the way, like in the previous post below for example. Most of you can relate to what I have to say, some of you don't and that is fair and highly normal as we all are shaped differently - but also quite a few of you have the tendency to read wrong into written words. You should never believe that I judge peoples lifestyle or have any objections to the choices they make, as long as they are happy with what they've chosen. What I've always questioned though, are those people out there who wish to be happy and want more of their life, but who don't take the advantage of their inner strength and go out there to grab what life has on offer because of fear of failing, fear of embarrassing themselves, fear of being left alone and lonely or because they need to prove something to everyone else around or whatever else reasons there can be that prevents you from doing what you truthfully dream of. You know the ones who stay in destructive or unfulfilling relationships or with boring jobs or in places or towns where they do not feel like they belong even though they know they would have been much happier and more fulfilled with something/someone else. You know the ones who dream and dream but never come to fulfill any of those inner desires because of fear. Those people are the ones I speak to when I say what I said in the post below. You others shouldn't allow yourself to take my words too personally, if you do I must assume you are one of them I just mentioned.

Try to make yourself happy, be conscious of what you really need, what you really want, who you are deep inside, don't lie to yourself and try to enjoy your life to the max, you got only one. Life shouldn't be much harder than that, some of us realize this when they are young, for others it takes a whole lifetime to figure this out. Everyone chooses individually when the time is right. And obviously, it goes without saying that you are free to choose to do exactly the opposite of what I just suggested if you think that works the best for you.

Now if you excuse me I will try on what was hiding inside of this colorful package. Talk to you later.

Fear and falling

What many people do wrong in this life is that they don't dare to make mistakes. It can drive me insane when I see so many human beings with great potential being locked up because they are afraid to fail, afraid to fall, and desperately they hold on to the only reality they ever knew, thinking that this must be the only way to go, even when they're not content with their life situation. But it is not before you let go of your lifelines, when you've released yourself to the risks of the reality, when you fully opened up your eyes and acknowledged the truths around you and when you have fallen on your own knees a couple of times that you fully can become you. Do you really want to remain a pale shadow of what you could become? Do you really want to limit your own personal development just because you are afraid? Afraid of what? What is it that could really hurt you? Take some risks, enjoy your life, break some rules, don't look back and remember that there are thousands of other ways to go than the safe road you always walked along. Life is grand and holds a mountain of opportunities, both technically and mentally. Don't limit yourself to the minimum.

Time for a break

There's been a lot of work done here lately. Boat work, budget calculations and planning for the new boat, blog projects, book projects, photo assignments, body work at the gym, article writings, designing of that new website and everything else in between. Can't complain too much though, all of that will hopefully lead us to an even brighter future and everything we work on is completely self-chosen so we'll continue to work on, move on towards our goals. I remember we once said something like mmm, it will be so wonderful to finally have some peace, no work no nothing, just peace, on a deserted island far from it all... but we have slowly but surely understood that people like us we can't be just still doing nothing. At least not for a longer period of time. We need our projects and new exciting goals to look forward to, to be able to enjoy life fully - even if we physically might be away from it all. As long as we can be our own bosses and plan for our days as we wish, and as long as we enjoy what we do and have the time for what we love, then we're more than satisfied. And if we on top of all that have the freedom to move on the sea and in between countries as we wish, then life is pretty damn close to perfect.

But now let's leave work at home for a while and let's spend the rest of the day at the beach. Will try to have one complete afternoon with nothing but r e l a x a t i o n. Talk to you later. /T

Break the rules

Hello, ms carrot head here. Just wanted to wish you all a wonderful weekend, cause that's some sort of a tradition we established here on the blog isn't it. It is weekend almost every day in our lives nowadays and a Friday and Saturday doesn't actually differ much from a Monday and Tuesday. Kind of amazing when you think about it. We've been away from home now for nine months and in spite the hard work we had/still have on the boat, we are now more free than ever. Of course it can be hard in small doses every now and then when we miss our families and friends, but over all this is totally the way we always somehow dreamed of living. Free, unbound, attached to nothing, no obligations to have to deal with, no stress that makes ones life miserable, no greater burdens on our shoulders than perhaps that pile of dishes that we've left too long, the dinghy which should get cleaned once and for all or that laundry bag which we continue to neglect, but other than that - life is good. And I get a feeling that it is like this the life is supposed to be. Were we really born to do anything else than this? 

Can you for a second imagine the feeling of being completely totally free? I'm not sure that all of you can, but if you ever get the chance to release yourself from the rat-race, say goodbye and see you never again to things that disturbs you and to be able to completely immerse yourself in peace and harmony away from mental stress and obligations even if only for a while, take it, it will fill your heart with such appreciation for life that you didn't knew one could feel, and you would be able to create feelings and thoughts that you never had time for in the past. You will start to appreciate the smallest details in life and your eyes will begin to recognize things which you never would have noticed before. I don't know really how to tell you all of this without sounding like a religious freak, but my soul has definitely opened in a way I never experienced before, and for that I can only thank myself. And Alex of course. I am so thankful for the day we decided to take the step out and make reality of this dream. This dream, our life, has done more good for our hearts than we could have ever imagined beforehand. And still there is more than 100 countries left out there to discover, a couple of more oceans to cross and thousands of more interesting people and beautiful places to visit before we're done with this journey around the world that we've embarked on. If we ever get done and ready, that is. 

So have a great weekend you all wherever you are in the world. And promise me you will try to make reality of all those dreams you have deep inside. No one will ever thank you nor remember you for the things you always dreamed of but never made reality of, try to remember that. My thoughts are especially with my best friend today who are just about to move to the other side of Europe to throw herself into new dreams and a new life far from the expected.

Cheers to all of you out there who are brave enough to break the rules and taking advantage of what this beautiful, magical life has on offer, I'll have a sweet mango cocktail for all of you tonight. /T

Balance your body and soul

After questions about our camera equipment, training and fitness seem to be the most frequent subject of emails and inquiries we receive from you dear readers. Mostly it is other women who ask me: "how can you stay fit when living aboard a small sailboat?" or "please tell me your daily fitness routines?"

So to give you some hints on what works for me, I've listed the top five most important things that has been implemented into my everyday life. It might not be the right way to go for you, but it is no secret that my body is in its best shape ever, because of these following factors:

1. I don't drink much alcohol. Or at least far from how much I use to consume in my previous life. The life before Alex and the sea that is. It took me around one year to fully appreciate the fact that I had met a man who doesn't drink alcohol. Or let's say, a man who drinks alcohol only on very rare occasions, once per month at the max. I definitely thought it was quite boring in the beginning, who would I now go wild and crazy with? But after a while I realized how extremely good it was for me. Not only for my body, but also for my mind and my soul. Instead of waking up with a hang over 2-3 times per week, I am now able to use that energy for other, much more important things in life. And I guess you all know it, but you do definitely get a greater appetite for life in general, food, sex and basically everything when your body is feeling good and doesn't have to fight to burn toxins out of your system. My skin too, has gotten much better by decreasing my alcohol intake and my skin is a very tricky and sensitive chapter let me tell you. I used to drink 2-3 bottles of wine per week. Nowadays I drink only 2-3 glasses during the same time and this is the greatest reason why my body is responding so well to my minimal exercise efforts. 

2. I am genuinely happy. I have much love in my life. And I try to surround myself only with what will bring joy into my life. This is such a cliché, but that is the truth. When you have cut off the things in life which bothers you, stresses you, makes your life only one step heavier than it is meant to be and you focus only on what really matters - your body will react in the same harmonic way that your mind. I can't enough talk about the importance of making yourself the happy and fulfilled person you want to become and I know that most people know what would or could make them happy, but few has the guts, the strength or the tools to fully apply it. Don't lie to me now, but I am absolutely convinced that you have a couple of things in life that really bothers and stresses you, right? Busy and stressful work, some annoying colleagues, an old friend that is in your life because it just is like that but you can barely stand him/her, annoying neighbors, narrow-minded people in your town etc etc. God knows how many fake, jealous, destructive and energy sucking people I have kicked out of my life in my past, just because I believe that is ones own duty to make sure that you stay happy and that you can put all of your energy on the things and the people who really deserves your time. People who makes you happy, who understands who you are and shows you the respect that you fully deserve = these are the only ones who should be able to get into your private sphere in life.

Health is the state of complete harmony and balance between your mind, your body and your spirit, and when your mind is constantly working against something that stresses you or something which doesn't make you genuinely happy, your body will automatically begin to defend this mood first. It is your body that carries the burden of your mind in the end, and if you are not in balance mentally, it is hard to achieve miracles with your body. One of my greatest advice both when it comes to exercise of your body and life in general, is that you really should try to do the best you can to make yourself a happy person. It is your human right to be a fulfilled, content and happy human being. You don't have to deal with people that disturbs you, sucks all of your energy, who are fake and abusive, or people who doesn't show you the respect you wish, there are other partners and friends to make. You don't have to let your body and mind suffer from a stressful and destructive carrier, there are other ways to go. You don't have to live in a society/city/community where people are narrow-minded, fake, selfish or whatever it might be that disturbs you, you do have a choice. It is when you get rid of mental distractions that your soul fully opens, and when that happens, you will be able to move mountains, please believe me on this one. 

3. I drink a lot of water. Well another cliche, but a true one as well. We have all learnt since we practically were babies, that water is the key to health. It will make our skin glow, it will help to burn toxins out of our system and it is vital for the overall performance of your body. Here in the tropics it is easy to always have a bottle of water on hand as you desperately need it, but don't wait till you're thirsty to grab a glass of H2O. Try making it a natural routine to always have a bottle of fresh water close at hand. Water is life in so many senses, and it takes such a small effort from your side to refresh yourself with it. 

4. I cook and eat healthy food. Well most of the times that is. Here in the tropics there are always easy ways to get fresh vegetables and fruits for a low price. I make sure to concoct our meals with as much vitamins and proteins as we possibly can get into a meal. And this ain't no boring food, mind you. I think it is very old fashion to believe that healthy food is boring food, as there are so many variations and options out there. I have also decreased my consumption of chocolate, unhealthy snacks and candy, because I have understood that every time I eat something or every time I'm about to put something into my mouth, I have a direct choice in going towards the right direction of getting to my dream body, or working against it. I most of the times elect to go towards what will make my body happy. This is also something that is much easier to obtain when your mind is clear and when you are living a fulfilling and joyful life. I said that all these things are connected, didn't I?

5. I do natural exercise. When living on a boat and traveling by the sea, it is very far between proper gyms'. In the beginning it might have been frustrating to find out that there aren't any spinning bikes to get a hold on on most of our travels across the world on the sea, but I have instead developed my own type of exercise that works good for me. Swimming is one, can't tell you enough how good it is for you. Again, this is good way of keeping many parts of yourself in shape. Your body will be happy with it when all of your muscles are working in great symbiosis. Your mind will feel good with it, because again, you are in connection to water, and water is life as far as I know of it. It is in water that I feel harmony, where I relax my mind and my soul and to be in touch with water gives me some kind of mystical strength and a greater appreciation for life. Added to my water training, I do sit-ups every second day to keep my abs in shape, I also make sure to give my ass some good training with classical donkey kicks and lunges, every second day or so. We are also out on excursions in the nature quite often, and walking and climbing are some of the best natural ways to keep your muscles in shape. 

Like I earlier mentioned, these are only my own guidelines which are normal in my world, they might work for you or they might not, but perhaps it can give you some ideas of how to begin thinking when it comes to training and how your body reflects the state of your mind. Everyone of us can make at least some smaller improvements in their everyday routines of life, and almost every single one of us are the masters of our own mind, body and soul - remember that. Take advantage of that. And make the best out of what you have in your hands. We don't have to be extremely fit all of us, but at least we can make the best in making ourselves healthy and happy human beings. /Taru

Families on their way

It seems like we finally will have some of our beloved parents, sisters and brothers visiting in the next couple of months, not a day too late! The only problem with a journey of a lifetime like this one, is that you are so friggin' far away from the rest of the people you love. But missing is also a great part of life, isn't it? Just like pain and sorrow and disappointments are. These are the things one never can hide from, and shouldn't, in order to become a complete, independent and strong human being. It would be an absurd shame to stay at home, desperately holding on to the safety net, just because one might have to face the risk of suffering from one or more of those things. To dare is to live, and to let go frees you to be able to grow and develop yourself into the person you want to become. And would we have stayed home close to all of the people we love, we would never been able to take part of all of these wonderful times and happenings at sea, all of the new personal insights we've developed, the inspiring people we met and the amazing places we get the chance to visit. Or all the other beautiful, inspiring, fulfilling things we've come across and have learnt during our many earlier years abroad and while independently traveling the world.

But right now, the joy for today, is the fact that some of the most important people of our lives seem to be on their way to share a couple of moments with us in our new life here in the Caribbean and we can't wait for July, August and September to arrive so we can share it all with them for a change. /T

More from the Atlantic Crossing

Windvane from Sailomat working excellently all the way through. We're so extremely happy that we in the end decided to go for this one. This Sailomat steering system works as flawless in as little as 10 knots downwind as it does in 45 knots and this setup must be the best one there is on the market for wheel steering sailboats, and others for that matter. We couldn't have been more satisfied with our windvane and can't even imagine what we would have done without it on this long passage. We have the Sailomat 760. Thank you Stellan for sponsoring our tour!

Reading aloud for each other was one new hobby we established. 

One of the very few moonlit nights. Most of the nights were pitch black and only some stars kept us company (those nights which we were not visited by enormous squalls that is.) Moon 20% of the nights, squalls and rain probably 75% of the nights.

Dolphins visited us occasionally between the Canaries and Cape Verde.

Lunch time, before we ran out of bacon and other meat.

Homemade bread made in the gas oven. I'm looking much forward to start using the Remoska again soon, now when electricity is an easier thing to obtain.

A stop made in Cabo Verde.

Caos in the middle, on anchorage one morning in Mindelo, Cabo Verde. Yeah yeah, I know, it's my job and I forgot to take back the fenders after visiting the fuel dock.. 

Spicy chicken and turmeric rice for another lunch.

Problem with the forestay.

Interesting book.

Another gourmet lunch. Not.

My sexy captain.

While there still was meat onboard.

Fixing and trixing.

Ribs and garlic baked potatoes.

Alex playing with our friends.

One of those sunny days.

So where was I? We had some inner conflicts going on when I wrote that last post from the sea and some of you thought we've been fighting as of the lack of updates on the last five days of that crossing. That was not quite correct. The satellite connection failed and we couldn't get it started again to my frustration, a frustration which was present for around an hour or so until I realized that that sudden connection failure, too, was a great relief of some sort. 

Either way, on the last week of that ocean passage we came to realize that an ocean crossing could bring not only good and positive feelings, but also a lot of inner speculations and retrospective confrontations which one hadn't had the time to reflect upon when we've been busy running around on land in that typical wheal we all know of. One day it was like our brains opened up and we began to reflect upon millions of things which gave us reasons to discuss and discuss and analyze our lives over and over again. Nothing bad for the relationship or anything else for that matter, it was just things in our individual pasts, about our life stories, about things we've done, things we hadn't done etc which we might not have fully made peace with. We're extremely happy to have gone through it all on that lonely ocean though, especially with each other's support during those dark and cold days and nights as one most possibly would have gone totally crazy in case any of us would have done this crossing alone. This trip was more needed for us as partners but also for us as individuals than we could have ever imagined beforehand.

As we were so late in time to cross that damn ocean, we were quite sure to get good help by the established tradewinds for our passage. We couldn't have been more wrong. There was no wind for half of the time and for one full week, the last week, we had loads of more wind waves and rain than we've ever heard of anyone experiencing during their Atlantic crossing. We had imagined the max wind speed to be around 25 knots as many books and people informed us so, but when having had to dealt with near gale, +30 knots plus loads of gusts up to 46 knots, for almost a week, we were quite sure that this wasn't no longer a typical Atlantic passage. Were we scared sometimes, people ask us? Yes we were, or at least I was at a few minutes here and there, not maybe for our lives too much as I trust in the safety equipment, life raft, my destiny etc but much more for the boat, our home. It is a terrible feeling having to hear the rigging screaming and shaking like the shrouds would fall down any second, or experiencing your home banging from one side to another while you're getting 6 meter (19 foot) waves covering the whole boat over and over and almost knocking you down from the beam. There were moments where you thought you had it all under control and others when you simply said, this is it, it is all up to the nature now.  Imagine yourself putting all of your most precious belongings into one container and then trow it into an enormous washing machine and all you can do is to hope for the best. Obviously it is a bit stressful.

Of course it wasn't that bad every day. Many days were the total contrary of what I just described and we had loads of fun - fishing, cooking, discussing life and its wonders, reading, baking, making plans for our future and even dancing - but what I will remember the most will definitely be those nights of inner contemplations and hourly sessions of therapy conversations along with the stormy days and nights and those tremendous waves we surfed upon. Waves which I never seen in my life before except in movies and youtube clips. Waves almost as tall as our mast for christ sake - and all of those memories which at the time for their appearance might have been quite painful, have now turned into something extremely positive. I will always remember it all as something to be proud and happy for, glad that we were strong and confident enough to go it all through. It might have been hard and quite painful at many occasions both mentally and physically, but the strong feeling of proudness and the reward we got which was to finally arrive in the Caribbean and establish a new sort of life here, and from time to time being able to look at our boat and each other and say we made it - is much stronger than any pain we felt out there on the ocean. 25 days is a pretty long time if you think of it from one perspective, but such a very short period in comparison to how many days we'll be able to enjoy what we came here for. 

It also felt extremely good to be up in that airplane the other day, it gave me another perspective to what we've just gone through and a warm feeling of thankfulness and proudness washed over me once again when I looked down from above, 10.000 miles over those waves which we just had been fighting with. /Taru

Night contemplations on a train

In the winter forests between Toulouse and Le Pays Basque (Pau).

If sailing is number one of my preferred ways of transportation and flying the least favorable, train must be up there on number two. The tranquility which embraces your brain when being able to observe the colorful scenery rapidly flashing by gives time to breathe and think, and that is some of what I value the most in life, nowadays. There were times, many years, when I had hard to slow down and I was kind of always on the run and in rush and always looking for something new and now when I analyze those different episodes and chapters of my past life, I can look back on it all with a smile while wondering how the hell did I have the energy for all of that - because right now: peace and harmony is much more worth than anything else that I can think of. Gone are the parties till 9 in the morning, gone are the hectic social life that had to be nurtured and which I loved and valued a lot of course but it is such a distant life to now. Gone are also the constant stress which comes with always being on hunt for one more rush and one more kick and more and more excitements and although there might have been times in my past in which I never thought I would come to this stage, I must say that this calm and harmonic episode is the best time of my life. At least in another way. Obviously I wouldn't know the difference if I hadn't experience the extreme contrary, so for that too I am grateful, for all those contrasts my life has been filled with. Dear universe, I can't thank you enough for all of the opportunities to see so many things and worlds from so many perspectives. With my insights of life alone, I am a truly blessed and rich human being.

So when I was sitting there on that train the other day, listening to the metallic wheels gliding on the rails and while letting my body getting moved by the motion of the ride I asked myself: Are you happy now? Would you never change back to the other life for in that you were so rich, although in another way? Might not have been rich in love from the man of my dreams - but in other sorts of relationships. I had a newly invented business idea with a great future ahead for it and all the necessary contacts and investors ready to turn my ideas to a successful business, I was living in a trendy and happening city full of opportunities in a dream apartment just above Jimmy Choo and other luxurious brands and my balcony was facing Gaudi's trademark of a building on the best spot Barcelona had to offer for living. I was traveling every third week or so to other interesting places in the world and I was living my life to the absolute fullest in every sense of the word. I was strong and felt powerful as I had so many options and I most certainly didn't let anything come between me, my joy and my happiness. I had a driver, a luxurious car available at any time and people who cleaned my clothes and dishes whenever I needed a hand. I was getting spoiled and courted by many and I had a big bunch of friends with whom I had the time of my life in every aspect and both my bank account, my wardrobes and my jewelry boxes were constantly full and ready to give me that superficial glow and artificial happiness - just how many women only can dream of living. If you wish to make an comparison to make the picture more clear, Holly Golightly's life in Breakfast at Tiffany would have been far back in the shadow compared to my life adventures. I was happy. I was fulfilled, as to what were my preferences at that time. I remember I sometimes stood in front of the huge mirror observing myself in my marble coated Versace bathroom, I smiled and I said to myself: You are there now, this is what you have always fantasized of since you were a little girl and you have everything on hand that you could ever dream of. It was a happiness so strong and intense. Cause I had it all. Or did I, really? For what happened that night when I met Alex? How could I have replaced that life full of so much craziness and I'm talking in the good way - to the extreme contrary? I definitely do not mean to sound like a cliché but simply it was love what was missing. And while I've been evaluating and contemplating back and forth during the last 14 months since I decided to leave the past and move on to a new chapter (and it certainly wasn't easy, mind you) the foremost answer that comes up in my conclusions no matter how I twist and turn this thing, is that true love is the king of it all. 

So while sitting there listening to the rhythmical sound from the wheels of the train and with the camera in my hand trying to capture some sorts of balance and unbalance through the lens I quickly answered myself to my question: Yes I am. I am happy and content. I have lived both extremes and also much more lives beyond those two and I have had enough time and situations to reflect upon what really is true and right for me and the answer is already deeply acknowledged by every part of my body and soul. Yes, this is happiness. That type of happiness which doesn't bring you gold and diamonds but true joy and powerful feelings of love. I might not have a job or a stable income for the moment as I left all my security behind but I'm confident in our future plans and I'm willing to take the risk of being broke for a while just because I believe in this journey and in me and my man more than in anything else. This love, life and voyage might not take me on first class flights from one bling bling world to another but it takes me places, real places I've never seen before and it most certainly doesn't bring me black cards with unlimited spend with what you're able to do whatever you wish but it does give me a ticket to life full of purity and freedom and reality and adventures beyond anything I ever experienced and that is something which no titanium cards in the world can buy. 

For what else in life could ever be more important than love, harmony and a peace of mind. Even for a relationship anarchist, a true individualist and a cynical and somewhat destroyed soul who swore that she would never give her heart to a man for real - one day she had to give up the barriers and let it all go for the truth. We all need love and that truth is inevitable, even though the thought of that other type of happiness in another time of my life always will be a sweet memory of mine. 

Whatever happens in the future and wherever I/we're going, I will always feel blessed and thankful for what life had in store for me. Sometimes it takes only such small things as a ride on a train to realize and remember that we human beings have all the possibilities in the world to create our own dream lives. It all can be so easy, once we understand that we have the ultimate power in our own hands to make it happen in one way or the other. And when we get to where we wish, we must remember and have the humbleness to acknowledge that it might happen that although you think you know what is the best life can bring you, one day someone may enter your world and completely turn upside down and inside out on your believes. And for that possibility I am utterly grateful. /Taru

Hot fish soup with saffron

This definitely reminds us of UK when looking out on the constant rain pissing down outside, for the third day in a row. Or wait a minute, we are actually in the United Kingdom, suddenly it all makes sense. It's raining cats and dogs, like the Brits would have said. Non stop downpour - and the teak which were supposed to have gotten it's final tlc this weekend, must now face a terribly destructive shower instead. We will most probably have to stay here for 2-4 days more as of the bad weather that is preventing us from finalizing what has to get finished.

It is quite funny in a way. We have left the normality for many reasons but one of the foremost is that we do not want to be controlled and manipulated by any authority or the laws of the society. Basically we have chosen not to live a life that someone else have chosen for us, but instead living our own life as we strive for being as self sufficient and free as possible - and here we are, always controlled by the weather and winds. A paradox that on the other hand isn't too hard to live with - but interesting to reflect upon. There's always someone/something that has the last word in your everyday life and decisions. If it is not the structures of the society or governmental laws, it is the nature that stops you from certain things.

Here's a soup I made to get us warm in this terrible cold we're facing over here in Gibraltar. Make one for yourself if you wanna keep yourself hot.

Soup of cod filet, saffron and chinese mushrooms

Pan fry slices of onion and add some garlic cloves.
Cut in pieces and pan fry cod filet, 250 g would be enough for 2 people.
Bring some sliced shiitake mushrooms and red pepper cubes to the pan.
Sprinkle over salt, pepper and cayenne.
Add a dash of soya and some saffron.
Add whatever else you have in your fridge that could make sense. I had some crab sticks which made a good combo.
Add 2 tablespoons of natural yoghurt and the same amount of water.
Pour some white wine into the soup. One tablespoon is enough.
Leave it all to simmer for a while.

And there you go. Hot fish soup for cold winter nights.

Searching for the real meaning of life

People often ask us: How did you come up with this idea? To sail around the world? I mean you guys barely knew each other when you decided? How do you expect to be just the two of you on such small space for such a long time? Do you do this to run away from something? The list is long with wonderings and, sometimes pessimistic, questions so I will tell you the story of how we decided to do this and a bit about our philosophy around this journey. And life in general.

When Alex first introduced me to Caos, he had just bought her a couple of months earlier. It was a cold and windy November afternoon. The wind blew up to around 30 knots, it was freezing cold and there was cold water everywhere so the chance that I would get bored and never step onto a sailboat again were greater than I would give it another chance. But I went through it somehow, felt a rush of excitement when we stepped off the boat again in the dark and cold night and I told Alex that we definitely needed do this again very soon. Somehow I loved the new insight this small ride gave me. Not only the sailing, or the man behind the helm - but also the new spiritual reflection it offered. I was somehow impressed that a man, a tremendously sexy man like Alex is, would prefer to go out sailing alone in rough weather rather than spending his time and money on normal type of entertainment/soul searching that the norm in his age and looks would do. This man was a far cry from the jet set world, the wheel of consumption, the overstrained businessmen and the party-people that I, at this time, was surrounded by most of my time.

Alex simply enjoyed sailing by himself and he seemed to have found peace and happiness in the natural and raw things of life and I got incredibly attracted by the strong statement that his aura was screaming out. His calmness and his passivity to all things fake and worldly was and still can be a bit provocative in the eyes of a few, as he has no intention to hide his real self, but that is exactly what in the beginning got me turned on - and still do. Me myself had always been torn between the consuming lifestyle versus the deeper insights of how destructive and pathetic the superficial consumption society actually is/was - so to meet Alex who clearly was on the real side with real values, was such an incredible relief.

So I kept on seeing this sailor and he continued bringing me out on cold nights on the sea and even though I was/still is a very lazy and comfortable person who hated the cold weather (Spain had it's coldest winter for 80 years that winter), something inside of my head told me: keep on, go through this, it will reward you later on, and I did follow that voice.

Then one day when we had been seeing each other for a couple of weeks or so, Alex asked me: "Why don't we take the boat and go somewhere warm? Africa or maybe the Caribbean for some months?" I thought for some seconds and I heard myself say: "Why not around the world?" I remember Alex was looking at me like he thought I was joking. His face was thrilled of excitement yet extremely skeptical. "Yes, why not" - he said after a while of confusion, and smiled. Still wondering what the hell did she just say? Sailing around the world was obviously one of Alex ultimate dreams, as is for every sailor I suppose, but he was far away from making reality of that dream in this period of his life. And he was far away from thinking that he would ever hear the suggestion coming from the women of his dreams, a women like me.

When I think about it in retrospective, I am not sure that I at this time knew the meaning of what I just had suggested. One of my crazy ideas or a social experiment in a different world, is probably what my oldest and best friends would describe it as, without leaving a shred of surprise. And what Alex thought at this time is not very clear either. I think that he barely started to believe that the dream actually would become reality for real before maybe around the early summertime, this year. I, on the other hand, was sure of that this was the meaning of my life from the very second that I suggested the idea and I happily moved onto the boat after New Year. Still not sure how it all went so fast but something inside of me told me that it was the right thing to do. And the warmer it got in the spring time, the more I learned to love sailing and the life aboard.

As I had been working with online portals, blogs and all kinds of social media networks since I opened my online boutique and started my blogs back in 2005, it was obvious that we had to run a blog and a website to the project. It was also obvious from the start that we would bring in sponsors to lower the costs of equipment and most naturally would I take this excellent chance to develop my creativity and my passion and experience in photography and editing and share the beautiful days of the journey with the rest of the world.

Whatever we thought of and however we turned and twisted the idea between each other, it just felt perfectly right. Like there was never a better plan made. This was not only the journey of our dreams with the person we felt stronger for than for anyone in our pasts, it also clicked perfectly with our passions, life experiences and with the individual philosophical process which we individually had gone through so far, in life.

Call it the meaning of life or the mission on planet earth, we just knew that this was what we were meant to be doing. So when people ask us "how will you be able to live just the two of you on such small space and will you ever get bored" - we almost laugh as the question is so mundane, so simple compared to the years of thinking process we have spent to get here. I don't think there are no better answer to all of the wonderings more than: We just know it, from the bottom of our hearts and in every corner of our bodies, we know that this is the right thing to do. If it would mean that we will have to see only each other for two long years, live on tiny space and not having contact with the rest of the world, we would still do it - but obviously that is not the case.

So when people ask us: "Are you doing this to run away from the reality?" We just say: Yes, of course we are. We are utterly convinced that a detachment from the society is what we need for now, to reach those new insights which we're so desperately longing for - as the thing you might call the normality or the reality, aren't enough for us any longer. With our life experiences and insight in different worlds, we can truthfully proclaim that we're no longer interested in the normal way of living. Though I know I do it damn good, I do no longer want to be a part of the consumer society where the image you convey of yourself is more important than the real things: love, being true to oneself and the pure happiness you get from simple things. Don't get me wrong: money have to always be made and we will both always appreciate well made craftsmanship and quality in the things that we use, wear, eat and live on, just have a look at the boat we live in - we just believe that there is a far greater meaning with life than the world we have seen so far, and we can't find a better way to put our philosophy into practice, than to sail away. To only have enough material for what we actually need, that the things we use are perfectly efficient for our lifestyle and not to live in abundance, is what we're striving for. And with the love for one another, the nature, the sea and the like minded people we will meet on our journey, we believe that we'll find a more pure and truthful happiness which we cannot find in this normal world.

The most fantastic part with it all, with this beautiful thing called life, is that we actually have found someone who's the copy of ourselves in the philosophical aspect and who completely understands, what we both always thought that no one could adapt to. We've both, unconsciously, been searching for that someone who would be able to, not only comprehend with our philosophies and existential questions, but also being able to physically act on the desires of reaching a new level in life. That new something which requires the detachment we're now about to execute together.

The ones who knows us for real, our families and childhood friends, they know that we are two individuals who always have had the need to get out there in the unknown - yet when we feel that the time is right, we'll get back to collect some new energy from our loved ones. New acquaintances might take this type of disappearance personally, but most of them gets the point after a while. This is how we are and have always been. Although individually until now.

I can totally understand that it can sound provocative for some people that we're choosing to step outside of the norm to get even closer to each other and far away from it all. But this is what drives us, this is what is have to get done and this is what we have been waiting for for almost a year now. Or even a lifetime. Very soon we will finally be able to say: We made it, no matter where the journey will take us, how long it will last or how long it will be the two of us, we made it through to the other side. Mentally and spiritually we're already there - now only remaining is the physical part of ourselves, to reach to that next level where we believe that our souls will find a new, greater meaning with life.

Freedom

What an absurdly luxurious thing it is, to live on a boat. When the winds finally decided to cool down outside of the bay of Girolato and we decided to leave Corsica, we asked each other 'So, where are we heading next?' 'France, but where?' 'Let's wait with St Tropez for a while and let's start a bit more up North and take it on the way home?' 'I know there is a really good anchorage in Cap Ferrat, Nice - should we go for that one? 'Why not!' So we left the bay, pointed the gps towards Nice, trimmed the sails and kicked back to enjoy one more beautiful, sunny day on sea. With a book in hand, a peaceful lunch, watching the dolphins jump around the boat and later on we had an early dinner in front of the waning sun's final meltdown in the Mediterranean sea. 19 hours and a quick sleep later we got closer to the French coast where the Riviera was laid in front of us like miniature cities in the horizon, leaving us with the last chance to choose our landfall destination.

And here we are now, having a very French lunch in the marina of Cap Ferrat and thanking each other, for the day we decided to move aboard and gave ourselves the wonderful opportunity to have the whole world as our beautiful home and garden..